How I Actually Use Facebook

It has become apparent to me that I don’t actually use Facebook the way other people do, the way it was originally intended to be used.  When my friends discuss how it has taken over their lives and discuss the traps and pratfalls that they succumb to on the platform, I usually just stare at them blankly. In my head I’m thinking “that’s not how you are supposed to use Facebook” only to bite my tongue knowing that actually this is how majority of the public use it. Let me explain...

Facebook as an RSS Feed:

I’m not sure when it began to happen, it was definitely a gradual thing, time based, but my Facebook newsfeed is now more where I go to find out what is going on in the world rather than what’s happening in my friends lives. My number of Likes (700 or so) have well surpassed the number of friends I have (almost a respectable 400). I tried actual RSSing before but I found it information heavy and usually just didn’t read them all in the end, I like how the FB posts know not to be too spammy. So my newsfeed is where I go to find out whats going on in the news, when my favourite bands are touring, spoilers for my beloved television shows and which celebrity currently owns the Internet (I think it currently still belongs to Jennifer Lawrence but there was that one day it belonged to Jon Hamm’s penis, the Internet was probably bored that day). Then secondary occasional status updates from my friends are like a nice personal touch to my news digest but (sorry guys) not my ultimate focus. 

My Facebook Feed (friend light)

Facebook as a place to put all my things:

Anyone who is my Facebook friend must think I am pretty active on the platform, always sharing articles I like with them, posting music videos for everyone to see and funny pictures etc. etc. add nausea. Well, while it might appear to the untrained eye, that I am sharing all these things for likes, comments etc. in reality my Facebook wall is just where I put things I see on the Internet so that I remember where they are and can find them again quickly. They are not for you they are for me. See a 'Top 15 Cat gifs' post on Buzzfeed, post it to my wall to laugh at it again later. Someone shows me a awesome new band and I post their video to my wall to remind myself to download their album when I get home. I have a process to the whole thing and everything. If my wall is getting too full I occasionally put things on Husband’s wall because lets face it, he barely uses it. One time I posted a video of this band I was really getting into as a reminder and this friend of mine trolled me and started ranting about how shit the song was etc. Irrationally I began to respond with something like. “Hey bitchface, you have the face of a bitch, who asked you? I didn’t post this on my wall for you, I posted it for me. Keep your opinions to yourself!”, only to stop myself before hitting the post button and realise that I will come off as the mad one in this instance. That is how most people use Facebook GBM. They don’t think of it in the way you do. Again I also tried social bookmarking, Pinterest etc. but Facebook is what I know, so…

Facebook has photos of other people now?

Well there is no way what I am about to write is not going to come off as self-centred or narcissistic, but I figure whatever, full disclosure.  A lot of my friends (mainly women) go on about how they get stuck on this Book of Face for hours staring at pictures of the friends, friends of friends, friends of friends of friends, basically stalking strangers. I always get asked the question does this not happen to you? Well honestly no, it doesn’t. I mean why would I want to look at photos where I know I am not in them? There I said it. I’m sorry that’s just how my brain works. Egocentric yes and I am cringing now at my forthrightness but it’s just who I am. So yeah if you happen to post a group of photos from your recent night out, holiday, insert-event-here that I haven’t been apart of, know that I probably haven’t looked at them unless they were incredibly unusual or contained partial nudity or something. Sorry, please don’t be offended but conversely know that I couldn’t careless if you don’t look at my photos either. Again remember this forum is just where I keep all my things.

There, now you all know my secrets. I still love all my friends to bits and everything, Facebookwise they are just my second priority.

:-P 

GBM